Newgrounds.com — Everything, By Everyone.
Age/Gender: 22, Male
Location: Location Location
Job: Student
Hi
Newgrounds Stats
Whistle Status: Silver
Exp. Points: 9,610 / 9,990
Exp. Rank #: 859
Voting Pow.: 7.14 votes
BBS Posts: 5,009 (3.24 per day)
Flash Reviews: 108
Music Reviews: 0
Trophies: 0
Stickers: 0
Entry #15
It may be hard to believe, but Sonic the Hedgehog was once the coolest character to grace a 16-bit cartridge. When Nintendo and Sega were both battling for the hearts, minds, and allowances of impressionable young children across America Sonic was the edgy and mature (please hold your snickering until after I'm done waxing nostalgic) foil to Nintendo's already famous Mario. A man who, ever the whore for attention, had already starred in six massively popular games, a meaty handful of spinoffs, and had popped his moustachioed visage into dozens of seemingly unrelated games for no other reason than a complete lack of anything better to do with his spare time. He's almost like the Samuel L. Jackson of the video game world if you think about it. But I digress.
In an age when platformers were slow and methodical Sonic hit the scene like a nocturnal, underground dwelling rodent, hopped up on speed, and high on the dazzling beauty of giant golden rings. You flew through levels like Michelle Pfeiffer was giving free rim-jobs on the other side of the stage for the next thirty seconds (shut up, she was hot at the time). It wasn't a straight shot across the map though. The levels scrolled significantly upwards and downwards and offered plenty of alternate paths and shortcuts for those willing to experiment. The gameplay was completely original, revolutionary, and fun as hell. No longer were you fighting turtles and slowly ambling mushroom men. Your enemies were evil robots imbued with the vital lifeforce of hearts ripped from the chests of screaming baby animals pinned to cold, steel examination tables. Okay, perhaps that's a bit of an exaggeration, but when you're six it all seems rather nefarious.
As wonderful as the original Sonic was the series didn't come into its own until the sequel was released in 1992. It was prettier, faster, fine-tuned, and constructed better than the original. Every stage was an especial and memorable experience. From the straight forward starting point that was the Emerald Hill Zone, to the addicting slot machines of the ornate Casino Nights Zone, and the cannon filled skies and sticky quicksand-like bottom of the Oil Ocean Zone. Each stage was meticulously designed and detailed. The different routes one could take were even more varied and distinct than the original's. Then, to top it all off, the music in each stage was some of the best in any game at the time. Okay, I will admit that the music in the final few levels might qualify as ear-rape, but the rest is infinitely hummable.
The controls remained mainly the same (run and jump, think you can memorize that?) except for one vital introduction. The now ever-present Spin Dash. In the original, Sonic started moving at a frustrating crawl before accelerating to a blazing blur of blue. Now, one simply had to charge up the Spin Dash and they were smashing through enemies, setting new land-speed records, and nearly out-racing the camera.
Also of note is the appearance of Sonic's young ward and star of many an eyebrow raising fan-fiction, Tails. Usually he was a useless addition resigned to tagging along and being a glutton for punishment during the bonus stages. As soon as you started doing your thing he'd get lost until you slowed down or hit the end of a stage. If you were lucky he might get a few shots in on a boss. Plug in another controller though and a friend could take control of him. Tails still had a hard time keeping up, but it was incredibly fun to have someone helping you make it through the game and giving you that extra needed support.
Future Sonic games may have upped the ante with better graphics, a lock-on cartridge gimmick, and special stages that more closely resemble an acid trip (which have always sucked, Sonic 2 included) before the series was extruded out Sega's asshole and deposited squarely in a toilet in a neat log-shaped chunklet. For me though, the best game in the series will always be Sonic the Hedgehog 2. It created a balance for the series that can only be expanded upon, but never improved; and that my friends is what makes a true classic.
If you enjoyed this retro review check out my reviews archive to read more of my thoughts on various games, movies, and more

The People Have Spoken
21 Comments